Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by Thexs, Apr 1, 2020.
What advice would you like to give which more people should know?
I think that it's very important for people to realize that just because their actions don't affect them, doesn't mean it doesn't affect the people around them. A lot of times people forget that we all perceive and interpret things differently from one another, and it's something I always try to keep in mind before I speak.
The best advice I have ever received—and the advice I try to share with everyone who will listen—comes from a quote from my high school band director:
"You cannot control what happens to you in life, but you can control how you react to it."
Applying this advice to your life is eye-opening and allows you to have a much more tranquil outlook! It speaks volumes to how important your attitude truly is.
Don't rush into things and think before you do anything. The mistakes in which it only takes a split second to do, are the ones that sting the most.
optimism is a necessity in this life.
so many things happen on a day to day basis that we could choose to let ruin our mood which ultimately ruins our day. keep a positive outlook and accept that things could be worse, be grateful that they aren't.
look at the bright side in situations and consider your opportunity cost between contentment, anger, sadness, etc... emotions tend to really take a toll on someone when they're in tough situations, or just not having the best day. especially those days where nothing seems to work out. gosh, i hate those LOL.
anyways. that's what i try to remind myself of whenever something goes wrong, or when i find myself annoyed at small things. find time to take a breather and feel your emotions too, write them down, speak them out loud. it helps! :)
It's better being alone than having bad company.
I feel like a lot of people force themselves to hang out with wrong people for many reasons, one of them being that they're lonely and they don't have good friends so they just hang out with anyone, but my advice to them is that it's okay and healthier to be alone than to have bad friends who won't be there for you if something bad comes up.
Just be grateful for every day that come's especially with this pandemic going around, because we don't know when it will all end.
Always be a good person no matter how cruel the other person may seem or be, it goes a long way, plus, it's fulfilling
Never intentionally hurt an innocent person. It's the source of all evil.
When my friends come to me for advice, one of my friends tell me they get judged a lot by their friends and they're unsure how to handle situations like that. When I was younger my mom use to always say this "If you can't stand the heat, stay out of the kitchen". I never understood why she said that until I became older. My advice that has been passed down is if you feel stressed out by people, overwhelmed and overall negative feelings around your 'friends' you should drop them. Real friends don't treat you like garbage and they respect you. :)
Don’t be a jerk. Simple, yet so many people fail to accomplish this.
It's okay to have negative emotions and you need to allow yourself to feel them, let them out so that you can get better.
Yeah, this contradicts a lot of what people say. "Stay Positive" seems to be the key thing for a lot of people, and I'm going to outright say that's not the best advice(for some people), as this is shockingly hard for certain individuals and can be quite unrealistic. While trying to look at things in a "more positive" light is fairly decent advice, rather than actually being positive, there will be times that it's simply not possible and you are going to experience pretty rough emotions that are going to make "staying positive" practically impossible. This is coming from someone who got told this on a daily basis for an entire year, and to be quite honest, that only made me feel worse because of how horrible the situation was. It created this strange expectation that I needed to be happy or to at least have this glorious hope when I genuinely couldn't give that to anyone. I've met many people who have felt this way because of this ridiculous advice in situations where it's almost insulting to hear.
It is okay to be in that sort of mood, regardless of your gender, age, or the people around you. No one is going to be happy all the time, no matter how great things are going. You're going to experience anger, sadness and more. These are primary emotions and they're unavoidable. The best thing you can do is to release them in a healthy way and understand how to get back to a happier mindset rather than inflicting it on others and worsening your mood.
You should have someone you can trust in your life, whether it's family, friends or a complete stranger that is willing to help you when you're not in the best mood. Figure out what makes you feel better, holding it in helps no one, even if it seems like a good temporary solution. Honestly, as much as life is too short to "hold a grudge" or to be "upset", you also shouldn't dismiss your own feelings right off the bat, it's unbelievably unhealthy for your mental wellbeing. You're allowed be mad about something, life isn't always fair and you shouldn't just take it on the chin and ignore that you're not feeling okay, otherwise you're harbouring a whole lot of hurt that is going to come across in some way eventually.
Learning how to healthily deal with your negative emotions will lessen the heaviness of your feelings in the future and can help you mature emotionally and deal with said emotions better and even get better at preventing them in situations that would have caused them before(this doesn't apply to everything, somethings may always upset/anger you depending on what it is, but learning how to deal with this when it happens will make the process easier.)
Don't let others stop you from achieving your goals, no matter how big they seem. If someone or a group of people constantly criticize you for your actions when you're doing nothing wrong, especially in nasty ways, that's on them and you shouldn't let that affect you. I know it'll be hard to take in if you find out about it, but the reality is that not everyone is gonna like you for what you're doing or want to do. If you're clearly doing the right thing and working towards what you want to achieve, then keep moving forward. There will always be people who support your dreams and will encourage you to work towards them. Those are the people you want to listen to and will give you a positive influence in your life.
However, if the criticism is affecting you, and not in a good way (such as losing motivation, falling into depression, or wanting to harm yourself in any way), you should talk to someone you trust such as a good friend, a trusted relative, teacher, or therapist. There will be someone who will listen to you, even if you think no one will. Don't bottle emotions like that up, as that's an unhealthy way to cope with them.
If you only listen to the positive forces surrounding you while working towards your goals, then you'll feel much happier and it'll benefit you in the long run. You'll feel fulfilled that you ignored the toxic people and criticism in order to achieve your goals once you do achieve them. I have learned all of this from personal experience, and I thought I'd pass it on. With that being said, have a wonderful day!
Three big things that come to mind with this:
1. Never close people off if you don't like them. Some people, especially the people that you never think you will ever be friends with become some of your best ones. Trust me, I've experienced this multiple times.
2. When I am looking for motivation in general, mainly in basketball, I always remember the quote "There is always someone out there working when you aren't".
3. I feel this is the biggest one - if you want good friends, you have to first be the good friend. Good friends are hard to find, but if you want to make a difference in someone's life you have to initiate it. Be a loyal friend. Real friends are not only there for the good times, but they are even closer in the bad. Laugh with your friends, cry with them, and always stick with them. Friendships are so rewarding when you build up a strong trust.
I definitely agree with what you are saying and hopefully everyone who see's this understands that a lot of people take out their anger on the internet because they can't let it out at home. Never assume people are living their best lives cause in the end some people are unhappy and just don't feel good in their skin. Empathy. You never know what's happening at someone's place or what they've gone through in their lifetime. Just understand that when someone attacks you maybe they don't mean it.
Allow yourself to mourn, even though it may be hard and very painful in the beginning. It will pay off in the long run, I promise.
It's okay to show your emotions to others, it's okay to cry. It's okay to be mad or furious. You're human and things happen for a reason. Don't ever feel like you need to stop being happy to make someone happy, because your happiness is important and should never be lost because of a person. You should always love yourself because loving yourself is the first step to loving someone else.
You shouldn't listen to all the negative things people are saying about you because at the end of the day, you know who you are and you know what you should use your time doing rather than listening to all the hatred you get.
It's important that you spend time with your friends and family because healthy relationships provide emotional benefits that make you happier. Friends and family are people that I hold dear to my heart so it's important for me to be talking to them every day and asking how their days go.
I think some advice most people need to take is truly accepting yourself as who you are, whether that involves ***uality, race, etc. Sure if change is accessible, go for it. The reason I say this is because before you can start understanding and accepting other people from various insights, you need to be comfortable with yourself. Be proud of who you are and where you have came from. All the scars to this day are just proof of the wars you have battled, yet you're still breathing. You clearly survived everything you have gone through. So keep your head up and never stop believing in yourself! It not only helps you, but helps everyone around you.
Anyway, I generally believe that there's good in everybody so that's some advice that I just thought of. Seek help too if you need it, there's many people out there with open arms who care for what you say. Including me. Have a fantastic and safe day! :)
Man, just live your life the way you want to live it, and don't get too stressed out when something doesn't go your way.
I've been lucky to naturally always 'go with the flow', but I understand some people get stressed out very fast about the simplest things; when one tiny thing goes wrong, I really recommend trying to help yourself realize that it's not the end of the world; there's always a next time, a way to improve or fix the issue, there's always something you can do to make it better for yourself instead of standing there freaking out in your head like your whole life is ruined.
It may be hard to get yourself into this relaxed mindset, but trust me, the results are astounding once you accomplish it. Don't live your life always stressed, live your life free. :)